What I Learned About the Brain That Changed How I Talk About Price

I’m going to start with a simple question: When you hear the word "pricing," what happens in your body?

Be honest. Do you feel a slight tightness? A moment of internal tension? Maybe even a subtle defensive reaction?

Now try this: When you hear the word "positioning," what's different?

If you're like most humans, you probably noticed a shift. "Pricing" feels like judgment. "Positioning" feels like strategy.

That difference isn't just semantic—it's neurological. And it's the key to transforming your most challenging client conversations into collaborative partnerships.

The Hidden Psychology of Price Conversations

Here's what we rarely acknowledge: Price discussions are almost never just about numbers.

They're about identity, emotions, control, and aspirations. When a seller shares their dream price, they're not just talking about money—they're talking about validation of their life choices, confirmation of their status, and protection of their future plans.

When we challenge price expectations using traditional approaches, we're often unwittingly challenging their identity. Which explains why these conversations can feel so emotionally charged, even when we're armed with compelling market data.

The brain responds to "pricing" conversations as a threat. Here's what happens neurologically:

When clients hear "pricing," their brains:

• Activate concrete value assessment mindset
• Create binary "right/wrong" thinking
• Trigger defensive postures about worth
• Narrow focus to a single number
• Frame the conversation as win/lose

When clients hear "positioning," their brains:

• Encourage strategic thinking approach
• Support contextual, flexible mindset
• Expand focus to market relationship
• Facilitate problem-solving approach
• Frame as strategic advantage discussion

This isn't just theory—it's the difference between clients who feel pressured versus clients who feel empowered.

Why "Positioning" Creates Psychological Safety

The word "positioning" invites a fundamentally different type of thinking. Instead of defending a number, clients start exploring strategy. Instead of feeling judged, they feel consulted.

Think about it: When you position a property, you're considering multiple factors—market conditions, competition, buyer psychology, timing, and client goals. You're not just picking a number; you're crafting a strategic approach.

This reframe does something powerful: it moves clients from defensive threat mode to strategic problem-solving mode, creating optimal conditions for clear decision-making.

The Power of Both Money AND Time

Here's where positioning becomes even more valuable than pricing: it naturally brings both money and time into the conversation—the two precious commodities every seller must navigate.

Traditional pricing conversations tend to focus narrowly on the dollar amount. But positioning conversations encompass the whole picture:

• Money: What return aligns with their goals?
• Time: What timeframe supports their next move?
• Market strategy: How do these factors work together?
• Risk management: What are the trade-offs?

When you discuss positioning, you're acknowledging that their goals aren't just financial—they're strategic. You're recognizing that the "right" approach depends on their unique situation, timeline, and priorities.

How This Sounds in Practice

Let's look at how this subtle shift changes your language in real conversations:

Initial Listing Conversation:

Instead of: "Let's discuss pricing your home."

Try: "You've probably been thinking a lot about the positioning strategy that best serves your goals. Would you be opposed to sharing that with me?"

Instead of: "Based on the market analysis, here's where I think you should price it."

Try: "It sounds like you're weighing several factors to find the positioning that works within your timeline and goals."

Market Feedback/Repositioning Conversation:

Instead of: "The market is telling us your price is too high."

Try: "The market is providing valuable feedback on the positioning strategy."

Instead of: "We need to reduce the price."

Try: "You're probably struggling to find the positioning that addresses the market feedback without making you feel like you're leaving money on the table."

Notice how the second approach in each case keeps the client as the decision-maker while providing the same essential information.

The Collaborative Framework

When you approach these conversations as positioning discussions, you create space for true collaboration. You're not the expert telling them what to do—you're the strategic advisor illuminating the complete landscape so they can make informed decisions.

This framework acknowledges three key alignment factors:

1. Seller expectations (completely within their control)
2. Buyer perception (revealed through market feedback)
3. Market activity (demonstrated through showing frequency and inquiries)

Your role becomes helping them understand how these factors interact, rather than making the decision for them.

Why This Matters More Than Ever

In today's market, clients have access to more information than ever before. They don't need another person telling them what to do—they need a trusted advisor who can help them think through complex decisions.

When you shift from pricing to positioning, you:

• Reduce defensive reactions
• Increase collaborative engagement
• Create conditions for better decision-making
• Build trust instead of eroding it
• Position yourself as a strategic partner, not just a market messenger

Your Challenge This Week

Here's what I want you to try:

1. Notice your language: Catch yourself using "pricing" and experiment with "positioning" instead.
2. Observe client reactions: Pay attention to how differently clients respond to positioning conversations.
3. Practice the holistic approach: When discussing numbers, include time, strategy, and goals in the same conversation.
4. Stay curious: When market feedback arrives, approach it as information about strategy, not verdict about value.

The shift from pricing to positioning isn't just about changing words—it's about changing the entire dynamic of your most important client conversations.

Because here's the truth: When clients feel heard, understood, and empowered to make their own decisions, they make better decisions. And when they make better decisions, they trust you more, refer you more, and work with you again.

That's the power of a 2mm shift that changes everything.

Empathy first—especially when the stakes are highest.