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3 Realities of the Real Estate Business That You Need to Embrace

coach's corner mindset process management Apr 21, 2024
1, 2, 3

In real estate, a few things are always going to be true, no matter where you are, how long you’ve been in the business, or how many homes you sell.

These realities are not fun.

They are not easy to accept.

They are not easy to deal with.

But if you don’t EMBRACE them and learn how to respond to them in a healthy way, they are going to make you miserable.

Let’s break it down…

1️⃣ Every conversation is a hard conversation.

In real estate, you’re delivering bad news the vast majority of the time. Good news is the exception, not the rule.

Giving people bad news is uncomfortable, so your instinct is probably to sugarcoat it, spin it, or ignore it…

But that only ever makes things worse.

Embracing this reality means getting great at delivering bad news in a way people can actually hear and process it—in other words, mastering Tactical Empathy.

But before you can do that, you have to put the responsibility where it belongs: with the client.

We have a whole chapter on this in The Full Fee Agent. In your role as the trusted advisor, it’s not your job to decide anything. Only your client can do that.

So you have to let go of the idea that you have to solve every problem before you bring it up to the client. 

Only then can you practice Tactical Empathy—bracing them for bad dews, delivering it straight, letting them process, and laying out the options so they are empowered to make their own decision.

Your job is NOT to tell people what to do. It’s to make them THINK about what to do so they can make the best possible choice for themselves.

The reality is, hard conversations are what you do for a living…so if you want to enjoy your work, you have to embrace that reality and train yourself to get comfortable having the most uncomfortable conversations.

2️⃣ The pressure to perform is nonstop.

It’s part of the job. You’re never going to feel safe and secure. Your paycheck is always on the line. This business is a never-ending emotional roller coaster.

This will make you CRAZY until you understand that the only thing that matters is what you’re doing in THIS moment. 

You can’t change the past. You don’t know what the future holds. 

The only thing you can do anything about is the present.

This is so crucial in real estate because there’s going to be at least one twist in every deal. Things are never going to unfold the way you want on any kind of consistent basis.

So if you keep trying to control everything, you’ll ALWAYS be in fight mode. And if you keep waiting for external events to make you feel better on the inside, you’ll NEVER be okay.

I watched the Masters (the most important golf tournament) last weekend, where Scottie Scheffler won for the second time in just three years, at only 27 years old. (Only 18 people have EVER won more than once.)

What amazed me was his consistency. He led from start to finish in the 4th round, and he never flinched, even when several other players caught up with him temporarily.

He was just steady, steady, steady—while everyone around him had moments where they lost their cool. And when he talks, you see the mindset behind this remarkable ability to perform under pressure. 

He isn’t thinking about the hole he just played. He isn’t thinking about the trophy. 

He’s only thinking about the shot in front of him. 

He’s 100% focused on executing his process—analyzing the shot, choosing the club, lining himself up, and taking the swing—to the best of his ability, exactly as he has practiced it thousands of times.

THAT’S what it looks like to embrace the pressure to perform.

3️⃣ Worrying about money is never going to change anything for the better.

Worrying about money is a sickness. I see it every day. Everyone is always worried about money.

The truth is, no one is ever going to have enough money—EVER. No matter how much you have, you’ll always want more.

You think that if you have enough in the bank, it will take the pressure off…but I promise you, it won’t. I say that from personal experience, and from watching thousands of agents chase that fantasy with no success.

Nothing takes the pressure off other than what you do INTERNALLY, in your own mind…

And worrying is the LEAST helpful thing you can do.

The idea that worrying somehow protects you is FALSE. It does the complete opposite—it tightens you up and makes it harder to make good decisions and do your job well.

You always think you just need one more deal…and that can provide temporary relief, but it’s always temporary. However much money you have right now, if it’s not enough (and it never is), doing more of what you’ve been doing isn’t going to change that.

The only way to escape this sickness is to shift your focus to your PROCESS, not your outcomes.

As Bill Walsh, a legendary football coach, used to say: focus on playing the game, and the score will take care of itself.

You’re probably starting to see why I’ve been harping on so much about process lately.

Process is not just about streamlining your work to save time and get better results.

It’s an ENABLER of so much more.

Focusing on process helps you put yourself in the right MINDSET to deal with the tough realities you’re up against—without burning out or going insane.

That’s why our upcoming Process Bootcamp is such a powerful investment in your business and yourself.

Join us on Wednesday—you’ll be thanking yourself for it.


Have a great week,


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